Helping People

Hey everyone, it’s Caryn! I'm back after a short break, and this week I'm opening up about a powerful, life-shifting trip to California — a journey that truly marked the beginning of my new chapter. While I can’t quite reveal the full story yet (soon, I promise!), I dive into the emotions, the energy, and the transformation I experienced. This episode is raw and real — it’s about stepping into a new version of myself while staying grounded in the work of healing and helping others.

I also share two deeply personal stories about people from my past unexpectedly coming back into my life — and how those reconnections are challenging me, inspiring me, and reminding me why I do what I do. From emotional wounds to spiritual alignment, I reflect on the difference between helping and fixing, and what it really means to walk with someone through their healing journey. Plus, I give a behind-the-scenes peek at my growing presence on TikTok and Instagram, and how it's all aligning with my purpose. 

Episode Highlights:

[0:22] – Why I skipped the last two weeks and how California changed everything
 [1:33] – A powerful reconnection with a friend from my past and what I learned trying to “fix” him
 [3:50] – A personal breakthrough: realizing it’s not my job to fix people — it’s to inspire through my own growth
 [4:16] – A heartfelt message and review from someone I’ve helped — and why it meant so much
 [5:50] – Another old friend reaches out after watching my TikToks — a story of inner child wounds and resistance
 [7:22] – The difficult truth: some people aren’t ready to heal (and that’s okay)
 [8:31] – God’s timing, repeated cycles, and learning when to lead and when to let go
 [10:12] – Why social media is becoming a powerful extension of this podcast
 [11:30] – Exciting things ahead: staying connected, sharing more, and helping others formally

Links & Resources:

Instagram: @the_music_of_life_55

Be sure to follow, share, and leave a comment if this show resonates with you! Send me a message at podpage.com/themusicoflife to share your experiences, or to leave a comment. I'd love to feature it in a future episode.

Transcript

Caryn Portnoy: 0:02

Karen, hi everyone, and welcome to the music of Life. I'm your host. Karen Portnoy, before I get into this episode, please comment, ask questions, share some of your experiences, and don't forget to subscribe. I got guys. Wanted to apologize once again for having to skip the last two weeks. I was traveling again, this time in California. I was there for four days, and it was a very important trip for me. It was insanely amazing. I know I've spoken before about, you know, being on the cusp of something big and exciting and something I wasn't able to talk about, and I'm still not able to talk about it now, but I should be able to speak on it by early December. You'll hear all about it, and I'll be so excited to share it all with you. It was a very exciting and productive and monumental trip for me. It officially marked the beginning of my new life, and I couldn't be more excited about it. I don't mean to be so cryptic and and teasing, but I just, I can't talk about it just yet, but I promise I will. In the meantime, there have been some exciting things going on back at home, where I know I said, and a couple, I think it was a couple of episodes ago, I was talking about a friend of mine from when I was 19, who came back to my life not too long ago, and his life was just a mess. And I figured out in a short amount of time that he was sent to me to help heal him. And there was some interesting events that occurred while we were kind of reconnecting, and I was getting more up to date and up to speed with what was going on in his life. And, you know, I found myself kind of starting to give him little homework assignments, and you know, there was a lot of self deprecation and a lot of, like, negative talk, and so I was trying to get him to write down on a piece of paper all these negative thoughts that he says about himself. So it took a couple of days before we kind of regrouped about that. And then I said, Okay, well Next, write down some emotions that you attach to those words and how you feel about what you say about yourself. So I guess another couple of days must have gone by before that was done. And so at some point, you know, after this was happening, I realized that this is this is not the way this should go, and I realized that I was trying to fix him, and that's not what I'm supposed to be doing when I help people to heal. So I really kind of took a step back and thought about it, and I texted him that I owe him a big apology, that that wasn't the way that I should have been helping him. And I realized that it's not my job to fix him, but it's my job to fix myself and then inspire him based on how I fixed myself so he totally got that. And, you know, was really forgiving and all of that, and it was a great way for me to take accountability and to recognize that I was going about it the wrong way. And, you know, I took a step back and re routed my course, and it's been so much better ever since. So I also wanted to share he was so nice to write the like the most kind review on my website for this podcast, and I wanted to share with you what he wrote. Okay, he wrote, Karen has been a guiding light for me. I've been stuck for years, emotionally damaged by a woman who chose a new life rather than be a mom and wife, it destroyed me and my boys. This was five years ago, and I'm just now beginning to see my life's new potential. Karen has mentored me through and out of a place I hope to never go again. She is attentive, a very sharp listener. And is the genuine deal. Without her guidance, I'm not sure where I'd be. Remember, it's never too late to start fresh. I mean, this was a guy that was so negative when I first started talking to him. I mean, it was like doom and gloom. So I was, I mean, obviously I was so appreciative that he was so kind in that review, but even still to be somewhat hopeful and looking forward and thinking of ways that his life could be better was very rewarding and validating to me. But you know, it just makes it that much more meaningful when I can help somebody else. So that was that. And then lo and behold, there was somebody else that came back to my life from high school as well. This was a girlfriend of mine from high school, and she also is going through a really hard time in her life. And you know, I've been posting a lot of videos on Tiktok and Instagram lately, and she's been watching my reels, and so she messaged me and just said that, you know, she's really resonating with what I'm saying. And, and, you know, she wanted to speak on the phone, so we spoke for, like, I don't know, an hour and a half or something. And she really is going through a really hard time. And I identified her inner child wounds pretty quickly. And, and, you know, figured out what was going on, and gave her some words of wisdom and all of that. And, you know, I'm not really sure how open she was to hearing what I was saying, but I'm hoping that after we hung up, she got to sit with with what I said and kind of mull it over and think about it. But you know, some people, you you don't know where people are in their journey until they start talking about their story and what's going on. And you can kind of hear and read between the lines and get a sense, and my sense was, was that she's not really ready to heal. She's not really ready to walk away from her situation. She's not really ready to heal herself. There was a lot of storytelling about what was going on on the outside of her, you know, with all the people that she interacted with or was involved with, or whatever. So, you know, I'm not really sure how open she is at the moment. I think that she really needs to take some steps to leave the person that she's with, but she might not be fully ready to do that yet, and that's okay. I'm not judging her or anybody else for the choices that anyone makes. But, you know, she did come to me for help and, and, you know, I tried to give her some good words of wisdom, but I, you know, I don't really know how open she is to actually employing it in her life. So, you know, we'll see it's not, it's not a one and done. I'm sure I'll speak to her again and and see how things are going you know, it's just really interesting to me how God brought both of these people back into my life for very clear reasons To help them. I think that I'm doing a good job with the first person, and I think he's doing better, although, you know, it's always two steps forward and one step back. So everybody regresses at some point, but then you just got to keep pushing forward. And, you know, so I'm still on track with him, but, you know, I wonder where she's going with her situation. So, you know, I feel for her, because it was a very bad situation that she was involved with, with somebody else, and now another person, and clearly she's repeating cycles. So I'm trying to help her see how she needs to break those cycles. But, you know, you can lead a horse to water, but they have to be ready to drink themselves and and I would never pressure anybody or tell someone what to do. I can only give advice, and, you know, share my wisdom and share my experiences and and all of that. So hopefully, she'll find a way to move on from the situation she's in and and take a giant look inward to help heal herself. But it was, it was very eye opening and rewarding to be able to have any effect on either of them. Am, so I'm really happy about that. And, you know, it got me thinking about helping other people more officially and more formally, and so that's a direction that I'm definitely pursuing at the moment. Stay tuned for more information on that. I don't know. The things that I'm posting on Tiktok and Instagram have been really kind of like honest and raw and open and just talking about short reels and clips of my divorce and my experience, and I guess it's kind of an extension of what I'm doing on this podcast, but I think people are starting to really resonate with what I'm saying, and that's exciting, because that's why I'm doing this. So I think one of my reels are over 400 views already, and I've only been doing it for a couple of days, so that's kind of cool. You know, a few others are in the high two hundreds, low three hundreds. And, you know, we'll say I'm kind of getting my feet wet on Tiktok, so we'll see. But I'm enjoying it. For the most part. I'm enjoying, you know, people commenting, and as I grow and as I attract more people, I hope that I can engage more with my viewers and see how I can help them. So I'm going to wrap it up for now. It's getting late and I'm kind of tired, but I did want to pop on and just connect with you guys, because it has been two weeks since I've been on here, so I didn't want you to think I forgot about you and and I'll definitely be back next week as well. So thanks for listening, and I'll catch you next week. Please join me every Thursday for a new episode. You can reach my website at pod page.com/the, music of life. You can also reach me on Instagram, which is the underscore music, underscore of underscore life, underscore five, five. And I'm posting snippets of episodes in in my reels on Instagram. I would love for you to comment, like, share. You can also reach my Facebook group at the music of life, I'd love to have you there. Please leave a comment or a voicemail or review on my website. I'd really appreciate it. Thanks again for listening. I'll see you next week. You.